On fortune

I know that every moment with you is a gift, a blessing and a memory for posterity.  And we are lucky to have those moments so frequent. No. Fortunate. You come, and when you leave, the house is never the same.  It starts with a closet, then a patio hose-down, and ever so subtle all the stains on the wall are magically not there anymore.  An action that somehow washes away the stains on my life-apron.  You run to the pharmacy on your last day and buy multivitamins,  eye creme, and refills for the swifter duster. You are concerned with my health, my beauty routine and my home cleaning.  And who wouldn't want this everyday? I'm a fortunate child. But, it's more than housework.  It's soulwork. 

Our conversations stay forever pending. Because we never run out of things to talk.  Even as you leave, I already have something new to tell you.  The more we talk, the more I have to tell you.  We are fortunate.  A mother and daughter who talk to each other.  There would be no us, if it wasn't for our talking.  To know someone so deeply is to find oneself. And we have found each other. And when I think of my daughter, I can't help but see myself in her, just like I'm with you. Do you believe in the possibility of this continuing on into the next generation? Can Emilu and I ever be this way?  I only dream so.

Happy and blessed father's day

Dear Edgar: I don't pretend to say that you are the best dad in the world, although you are very high up, because many dads deserve that title collectively. But in our eyes, and in this house, you are the best dad we can ever ask for. Thank you hon, for giving me this amazing gift of experiecing motherhood. The road to parenthood has been rocky, but I woudn't change it for the world!

Happy Father's Day.

PS: World's Best TV dads
and Worst TV dads (Royal Tenenbaum should top that list!)

Grandpa's old farm

Growing up, grandpa's old farm was the idyllic place to spend the day during weekends. Through our innocent eyes, the farm was a place full of mystery and animals. My grandfather's mare was our ride of choice, and we could feed the pigs in their piggy quarters. There were chickens, fowls, and occasionally a few wild rabbits roaming everywhere. Today the farm animals are gone, with the exception of the 30 something year old mare, who gave birth to a colt soon after my grandpa's passing, and a old mule.  The colt is of no particular breed, more like a mutt, because we don't know who the father is.  He's what you call a country horse, goes by the name of San Miguel, and is my mother's fancy.  There are also four female dogs, formerly homeless and now living happily in the farm. 

My grandfather passed away three years ago. The lives of these animals are deeply anchored with the still beating heart of this farm. The farm may not be what it was once. But the animals give it life, and as long as they are here, the farm will too.

Little by little I'm learning to take pictures. It's not easy, even with a good camera. Sometimes, the picture you see in your head is not possible through the lens. I'm learning to appreciate the background, and see the possibilities. Photography is a school of self-discovery.

A birthday is soon approaching

 I still cannot believe our daughter is turning one next week. She was born on May 8th of last year. Her arrival was nothing short of exciting and miraculous. After three days of labor, a birth becomes extraordinary. In this short amount of time she has become a headstrong little lady with a luminous personality and a physical presence. At the playground, she's the one wanting to be close to other kids to touch them, chat them up (more like babble) and just to "experience" them. This, I find fascinating, because being a Taurus is about experiencing things with your whole body. It's the most sensuous sign of the zodiac, the one with the need to use its five senses simultaneously or you run the risk of getting scratched off easily.

My little lady here has been slowly graduating from being a high needs baby to becoming an independent, observant and intense toddler. Where does she get this temperament?  I can't wait to find out more.  In the meantime, I'm starting a letter for her about our lives together this past year, and all the hidden lessons I've come to learn by being a mother to her.  I hope she's proud of it, and one day can read it to her own children.


PS: If it was up to her, she'd be content being on top of me the whole day. I included this picture of her in the baby wrap to show you how attached she still is to her mami, even though she's excited about learning to walk, choosing more often than before to do this on her own (proud momma grin!)

On Motherhood

{Image via this Tumblr}

Sometimes, it's about fathers too. Love is love.

Motherhood: Simply Jackie

I've always admired Jackie as a woman and an icon.  Her style and fortitude are daily inspirations to me.  Today, I dedicate this Motherhood post to her.

“i don’t want my young children brought up by nurses and secret service men.” jackie

“if you bungle raising your children, i don’t think whatever else you do matters much.” jackie

“three attributes to describe my mother? love of words, the bonds of home and family, and the spirit of adventure.” john f. kennedy, jr.

{Photo source Jackie: A Life in Pictures via Mark D. Sikes}

Happy Valentine's Day

{Photo by Jena McCabe}

Happy Valentine's Day friends!  I'm afraid I've never been a romantic girl, and this holiday has turned so commercial I sometimes don't feel like celebrating it. Should we set a day to show our other half how special they are?  I try to show my husband every week how I feel by baking something special or preparing a nice lunch.  We don't need a day to remind us that we are lucky to have found each other.  How about you?

A time for daydreaming

There's a time for everything.  A time to mourn, to laugh, to reinvent yourself and to daydream.  I used to daydream, but after giving birth and taking care of my daughter other priorities or simple desires have taken a back seat.  I love how it made me feel.  It's similar to when you read a good book or a brilliant passage.  You feel renewed, recharged and fulfilled for the next task ahead.  And I read somewhere that daydreaming releases endorphins, which as you know, it's one of the body's healers, keeping illnesses at bay.  And it makes you a happier, more positive person.

When I was younger I used to daydream a lot.  I would knit stories and images in my mind of how I wanted situations to unfold.  Much like someone who smokes, and plans his moves around the next cigarette. I used to set aside a quiet time for daydreaming.  The effect was similar to soaking in a warm bath.  My soul and spirit were in harmony with my intellectual side.  And not surprisingly many projects or ideas were born in this nurtured environment.
 

I never do New Year resolutions because I never stick to them.  But this year, I will make it a habit of daydreaming at least a couple of times a week.  I need to get reacquainted with this part of myself.  Play with my inner child.  I highly recommend this.  Have you ever set aside time to daydream?

Images by Andrew via Flickr

Paris love locks

We all know that the City of Lights is the romantic and idyllic destination for love.  Dreaming of having our honeymoon there (if you are like me) and picturing ourselves living the Paris life at least once in a lifetime.  To capture this idea of romantic love, Ronda Carman from All the Best blog snapped this picture of heart locks, which have been attached to a metal fence on the Pont des Arts pedestrian bridge over the Seine River.

In recent years, couples have been attaching engraved padlocks to the bridge and throwing the keys into the Seine as a sign of never-ending love. How romantic is this? Although now sources say that the locks have become an eye sore on an otherwise pretty sight and have been scheduled for removal.  Oh how I dream of traveling to Paris this year to see them before they all disappear!